I make music. I make people laugh. I do neither on purpose. @mikefalzone




Guess what everybody’s going as this Halloween.



Pro tip: feeling down? Watch Mike Falzone’s walk and talk playlist on YouTube. It’s like a bunch of pep talks in a row.

I mean…it’s not a bad idea.

wolflet asked: Btw you're my fave. Question is - where do I find boys who don't just want to have sex with me? Or is there anyway to deter them from thinking so? K tanks :)

Hi! I suppose you can find them wherever. It just takes a little of the ole “getting to know you”

Be clear about what you want and I think you’ll attract more of the same.

Oh, I guess there are always acceptations - but don’t meet dudes on apps.

The other day someone told me to go look for apartments on foot instead of over the internet (granted - moving across town - you know what I’m saying - pay attention). The idea is that the apartments you find on foot are less expensive because people know how easy it is to search online. hidden gems, if you will.

Thousands of ‘good things’ are waiting to be found. Always.

Go out. Pursue your interests and passions. You’ll find someone. Probably not tomorrow but…maybe? 

Anonymous asked: Mike any advice for someone who's mother makes them want to lie under the front wheels of a bus??


Anonymous asked: Hello, a mediocre teenage worried girl here. Is it really true that you are more unlikely to meet intimate friends when you finish school and things? I mean, I have friends but I already find it hard to meet new people IN school, and I cannot fight the feeling that I may be alone for the rest of my life. Anyway, I hope that you have a dope day and the rest of your life.

Dear Girl,

Never call yourself mediocre. You’re never going to find friends like that (HA! Did you see what I did there? Gimme a minute - gimme a minute).

You can connect with someone on an “intimate” level when you’re 99 if you’re open to it. I’m also just guessing because I’ve never been 99 - but you know what I mean.

Making friends at a school is super easy because you’re surrounded by people all the time. By the same logic it’s also easy to get f’d over by people those because…welp…you’re surrounded by people all the time.

If you don’t feel like reading all of this: Schools (and work-jobs) are filled with people you didn’t choose to hang out with everyday in the first place. Keep you’re heart open, do the things you love with other people who also love things - you’ll find your people. No matter how old you are.

Love, Mike

Anonymous asked: Hey I am starting to adult now in my life can you explain mortgage what a is? Because I sure as hell have no idea what it is?

Lesson one: “Adult” is not a verb.

Everything pretty much works itself out after you get that down.

Anonymous asked: I just found out that I might have cancer and my best friend hasn't said anything to me. I know people process things differently but I'm really hurt and angry. Can you help me sort through this please Mike?

Hey, first of all good luck with everything. Make your mind well and hopefully your body will fall in line : )

You’re right, people process things differently. You do. Your friend does - you’re both probably scared, angry, sad - but how would you know if you don’t talk? 

Talk to each other. Listen to each other. 

Keep me posted.

Anonymous asked: Hey Mike. Apparently in my mind we're close friends... So, here's the thing. I have the biggest crush on a girl. She shows up sometimes in my church with some friends... She's just so pretty THAT I WANNA DIE. I DO MIKE! And I always think "that's fine, I've done this before, just go talk to her like the cool guy you are" but I can't. I swear to god, I get so awkward... She looks like a model maybe she is one, I don't think guys go through this... It's just such a weird situation... idk, thx

All guys go through this…daily.

I don’t know her personally, but chances are someone is going to talk to her eventually if you don’t.

Lastly, don’t talk to her like a “cool guy” Just be you.